Gardiner, MT

Month - October
Destination - Gardiner, MT
Travel Mode - Flight

Duration - 5-6 hours + 1.5 hr drive

I can tell that the Greater Yellowstone from the Tetons, to the Lamar Valley where wolves howl and grizzlies roam, acts as my spine, my range of memory that ties me to landscape of Other. And that the ocean from the rocky coast of Maine, to the Florida everglades, to the looming cliffs at Big Sur, sustain me, remind me we are nothing without salt water, wind, and waves. - Terry Tempest Williams

Our trip to Yellowstone was fascinating on many levels and we are so glad that we planned to see it, which happened quite randomly. We were exploring a Europe trip, Hawaii but they both seemed a lot to travel to with a 1 year old, also expensive. Then out of nowhere we picked Yellowstone - Madhu had always wanted to go there. As an immigrant, national parks are always something one wants to see and explore because in India there is no concept of national parks and it's not a common theme to preserve land and animals in the same way that the Americans do (so she says). For Jes, this was an adventure of sorts…

For this trip which would be a trip also to celebrate Nio’s first birthday, we went all out and decided to travel in the most comfortable way we can. First class it was. We had several thoughts after we bought the tickets that what our fellow passengers would think or respond to a one year old in first class. The best thing would be to not think about it much, also perhaps stop projecting and take it all in stride. A LOT of PLANNING was ahead of us. We had planned to flyintoMontana, and stay near the north entrance in Gardiner, MT - the entrance of the park was 5 mins from our hotel, but Yellowstone is so huge that to see anything we had to drive at least one hour. Our flight that morning went fairly smoothly, Nio was charming the pants off everyone and received first class service. It was really comfortable and Jes did such an amazing job to keep him breastfed and comfort him the whole time. When we finally reached Montana, the first thing you see are the grand mountains, wow!! it took our breaths away. It was one of the most beautiful things we had seen. We were talking that this was so much like Patagonia only drier. While we were descending, Jes got a peak at the mountains from the window and actually got teary eyed. This is the first time she ever responded to a landscape like that so she chalked it up to the Prosecco and exhaustion and kept it moving along. 

We have to say, sometimes there’s really nothing like a small airport. No shuttles or trains to get from your gate to baggage claim, not as much chaos. Leaving the Bozeman airport was as smooth as smooth gets (in an airport with a wriggly almost 1 year old, haha). From the airport to the hotel was a 90 ish minute drive but the landscape was so gorgeous that it went by in a flash. We found that although our trip involved a ton of driving, it always went by quickly because of the incredible views and breathtaking landscape. Even Nio, infamous for his hatred of car rides, was unusually forgiving of the long stretches we spent in the car. 

When we reached the hotel, we were greeted by Elks! They were literally right there, just grazing some grass on the front lawn, lounging around. We went on a hunt for food, but it being a small town, delivery was in short supply so we wound up at the local grocery store for dinner plus supplies. A great way to save money while on vacation is to buy and keep supplies for a few meals in your room/on the go. 

The next day, October 14th, our episode of If These Ovaries Could Talk aired. Yes, you read that right, we were in an episode of If These Ovaries Could Talk!! If you haven’t listened, find the podcast wherever you listen and (SUBSCRIBE and) listen to our episode called "Homo-steading, Pigs & Chickens"

You’d think that morning took us by surprise with how little we were prepared when we went out. But between being really excited about our episode and also so excited to get into the park that we just went! Driving into the park, Jes was again taken aback by her emotional response to seeing the landscape. She just sat quietly taking it all in, unable yet to articulate her inner world. Our first adventure was Mammoth Springs, which are hot springs and there’s a center there with a gift shop. The center was great for planning the second half of our day and we took a little jaunt up to see the hot springs. When we talk about poor planning, we mean that by this point Nio was more than ready for a nap as we were exploring the hot springs.

Mammoth Springs

Post seeing the springs, we decided we’d go back to the hotel for our other supplies and nap in the room before our next adventure out. After resting we head out to Lamar Valley, which is famous for wildlife sightings, especially bison (which are LITERALLY EVERYWHERE btw), wolf, and grizzly bears. The thing about Lamar Valley, is that you just have to keep driving through and hope to see something. There isn’t a particular destination with this one— a great lesson in enjoying the journey. One tip is, if you see a bunch of cars on the side of the road, that’s a great indication that something is there or coming so definitely pause to ask what everyone is looking at. 

On this trip back into the park, Jes brought up in conversation with Madhu how she had been feeling every time she took in the landscape. Madhu’s first reaction was that Jes had clearly been here before, in a previous life. Hearing this out loud made Jes’ breath catch. Even now, just thinking about it makes her tear up. It may sound a little woo, but Jes has never had such a deep reaction to a location before in her life. Two recurring thoughts came to her: first, that these mountains are the original gods; and second, that it was like looking at a piece of herself that she’d never seen before but was deeply familiar with just the same.

Montana Sights

Hoping to see some bears and wolves, we went about as far as we could into the valley. On our way in, we saw a few cars parked on the side of the road but couldn’t see a single thing in the valley or mountains surrounding the area, so we just kept going.  After seeing many bison, some very up close and personal, which was really quite spectacular, as well as the most extraordinary mountain ranges and plains and rivers, we decided it was time to head back. As we were driving along, we came upon a rather large gathering of cars on the side of the road and realized this was the same gathering as earlier but much larger! So of course we stopped, parking practically vertically on a hill in our teeny Ford rental, got out and rushed to look in the same direction as everyone else. And we saw BEARS! Beautiful, majestic grizzly bears—one big and one smaller, so presumably a mama and her mostly grown cub. I think we ended up taking a gazillion blurry and pixelated pictures of this event as well as some closer, better quality pictures as they got closer. What a treat!! Happy as can be, we head back to our hotel.

Buffalo/Bison everywhere

Day 3, Oct 15, was Nio's first birthday and we wanted to check out The Grizzly and Wolf Discovery Center in West Yellowstone. Keeping our streak of grizzly sightings going on, this seemed the most apt event for the day. On the way, we saw some of the most picturesque landscapes, it was truly breathtaking. Bison everywhere. At the center, we saw a couple of grizzlies, and then the stars were the wolf packs, they were incredible. Nio was definitely enjoying and taking everything in. On our way back, we stopped at a couple of places to take some pictures and hang with the Bison. We also had some elk and bison burgers for lunch.

Often as a lesbian couple with a child, we are guarded and less of ourselves especially when we visit states which are not known to be liberal. It happens that we were bang in the middle of one. However, everywhere we have been so far, the people we met have been nothing but kind and gracious. Of course our conversations have never been deep enough to know what they truly believe and think or how they would vote but on the surface it's been cordial and free of judgment. And for that at least, we’re grateful. Jes thinks it’s probably her white woman privilege bumped way up by having an exceptionally cute baby. 

After lunch in West Yellowstone we headed to The Grand Prismatic Spring, something we had on our list of ‘would like to hit, but not totally necessary,’ but we’re really glad we went! Our plan at the Grand Prismatic was to actually hike to a vantage point a little further up from the geyser and was a bit of an uphill climb - we did not truly know how much the uphill was going to be. We had planned to use the Deuter for carrying Nio up this hike which was a great plan except the wind was wild that day. Also, there was some snow and sleet on the ground. When we started to climb up, we saw the ice on the ground completely covering the path ahead and we were like newp! We are not doing this with a one year old on our back. So we headed back to our car and went to the main geyser parking lot. From this spot, you can see the geyser but not fully. We were definitely able to appreciate the beauty of the place though. There was a lot of mist/steam and it was bit dystopian to be honest. Lots of selfies followed. After this, we were all pretty damn tired and decided to head back.

We ended the day with an ever popular “cake smash.” Neither of us is entirely sure what that trend is about but we took a cute video of us singing to Nio and then him mooshing around some icing before hopping in the bath.

Next day we went to see Artists Falls, glad we did, we were almost skipping it. After the falls, we drove to Yellowstone Lake and boy, this is some of the most beautiful parts of the park. We had initially planned lunch at a restaurant near the lake but turns out it was closed when we got there. Anyway, we changed tactics and decided to drive around the lake towards Yellowstone’s most popular geyser—Old Faithful—and get lunch around that. This drive was one of the most beautiful drives we have seen. Yellowstone Lake is as blue a blue lake can be. With the mountains at the back, and the vastness of the lake and the quiet of the land, it was just the best experience. 

Last day in Yellowstone, we decided to take it easy and decided we would just do a simple hike and spend most of the day in the hotel, perhaps even go to the pool. We ventured out into the park to look for a spot to take a hike, this was all without any plans as to where we would actually go. Finally after some driving around, we saw this hiking trail and decided to check it out. It was quite nice to get out even though it was quite cold and windy. Among all three of us, we thought, Nio had the most warmest suit - his bunting suit which also makes him look like an adorable balck bear cub. Anyway, after this short drive and hike, we were back in the town for some shopping and some grub. WE found this cool place to eat, farm to table and which also happened to serve their own beer. No further research was needed. This was our place. Post lunch, fully satisfied, we went back to the hotel. Later that evening, Jes realized she was missing her wallet - panic had set in eventually when we looked for it everywhere and did not find it. Thankfully, we were carrying her Passport with us and that would get us through airport security. After this adventure, we were all quite done and called it for the day and night. Next morning our flight was around 11 am and we had an hour and a half drive ahead of us. The drive was not too bad at all, Nio was just hanging out with us and at some point dozed off. 

It was one of our best trips we took and though we pushed the limits in terms of traveling longer distances with a one year old, we absolutely planned well as much as we could. We saw some of the most beautiful sights, experienced wildlife in its element and felt one with nature. We feel fortunate.

Cape Cod, MA

Month - July
Destination - Cape Cod, MA
Travel Mode - Road

Duration - 5.5 - 8 hrs

When you have a baby you have to relearn how to live life. It's not like anything you've done before. I don't care if you're doing it in your teens, 20s, 30s, 40s, or 50s! Or beyond! This person comes first no matter what and you're in a constant learning curve with that. This vacation has been a perfect lesson in this concept.

Imagine this: the start to your existence is in October. With the exception of a few warm-for-October days, everything you know of the outside world is bracing cold and inside is either perfect or a little chilly and then quickly changed for your needs. Slowly it warms up, you're cool with this, so far my parents keep me comfortable. SUDDENLY it's hot as fuck and humid as fuck and no matter how much you whine or whimper or yell, no one seems to be able to adjust the temperature to your needs. WHAT THE EVER LIVING FUCK IS HAPPENING. We're pretty confident that this was a big part of Nio's experience this vacation.

The person we air bnb'd from had very strong feelings about the environment and we suspect this is why she didn't have A/C. Something we very definitely did not think to look for when booking and VERY definitely will think to look for in the future.

From the start this was an ambitious undertaking. With absolutely no traffic its a 4.5 hour drive but we all know better than to expect no traffic. We planned for pit stops along the way and the drive there wound up being difficult but manageable. It did get extended to 5.5 hours but we live to tell our story. Upon realizing that there was no A/C, we were highly optimistic and determined to not let this affect our vacation. The one respite was that there was a box fan in the apartment - situation was very similar to being on Survivor where the creators would leave a rudimentary object for the players to survive and display their creativity. We napped and hung out and of course made pork chops (our signature dinner). After smoking ourselves out of our living arrangements, we did wonder why do we continue to bring pork chops/steaks for our dinner. Anyway, it was delicious. While we are on this topic of eating we also did not choose our surroundings perfectly, while we had to take turns eating and holding Nio. There was a lot of stuff in the apartment, we couldn’t safely let him explore. BUT the apartment was beautiful and nicely furnished (Nio even found a prayer bell to play with), with many pieces of art work filling the walls and the location was really impressively beautiful. It was located in the very middle of town and yet highly secluded and surrounded by marshes which made it very unique. Being surrounded by so much greenery and natural beauty had a meditative feeling to it. 

Day 2: 4th of July - Intentions: beach and fireworks. Achieved: accidental feature in local parade, beach day, and Seafood mound. Ladies, gents, and esteemed non-binary audience members, we knew there would be a parade and had full understanding we would likely be stuck if we did not leave early enough. We had the best of intentions, but alas, life with a baby means rarely being on time. We did indeed leave after the parade had begun. There was a single means of egress and—you guessed it—it was the parade route. So when there was a break from the muscle cars and convertibles of yesteryear, we entered the parade route and drove along like our Honda CR-V was a classic vintage model. Madhu waved enthusiastically from the back seat window, nonchalantly wearing her baseball cap which says “Supreme Leader”—an immigrant in a sea of proud Americans. Jes drove and did what she could not to die of embarrassment. The crowd cheered us on exuberantly and we made it out alive.

Crashing July 4th Parade

We got to Marconi beach which was very beautiful and on a natural preserve land. There were good number of people already but we were unfazed, though Nio did get a little uncomfortable in the beginning and had to be calmed down by quickly attaching him to Jes’s boob in the protection of the tent (which we bought the second time). WE believe there were three factors to his discomfort at the beginning of the beach day . A) higher temperature than he was used to. B) More people than he was expecting. C) Bigger waves which were making more sounds than he was used to. After he settled we enjoyed our blackberries, Prosecco and lots of dunking in the ocean. We spent the entire morning there, then we got hungry for lunch and decided to check out Arnold's. Arnold's was just fantastic, specially for Madhu who devoured a 2 pound lobster and I saw a little halo at the end of it. 

This is how you do it

We had considered giving Nio his first taste of lobster but we realized that shell fish is a common allergen and we did not want to find out what the inside of the local hospital looked like, instead he had his sweet potatoes. After all this, we went back to the apartment and on the way we made mental notes of a few places we saw near our air bnb like a leather shop and the seafood market right next to the apartment. We took it easy the rest of the day. We had planned to see fireworks, however, we wound up feeling it would be a lot of work and little pay off. So we called it. (Side note, we tried to watch the Boston fireworks on TV but did not realize until pretty late that they don't start until the middle of the damn night, lol.)

Marconi Beach Day

Day 3: Intention: Hiking and Provincetown. Achieved: Hiking and kind of Provincetown. Today we were determined to hike and use the Deuter which we had spent 300$ on. We went to Mass Audobon which was again a gorgeous wildlife preserve. It had wooded area that we walked through as well as marshes and our path culminated at low tide on the bay. We had a great time, especially having Nio with us, he was really enjoying everything and very into it. At the end of it, he was knocked and we were pretty tired too so we headed back to the apartment and took a little breather. This was a real highlight of the trip as both of us really want to spend more time being active outdoors. 

Mass Audobon Hike

Nio knocked out at the end of our hike

After resting a bit, we headed over to Provincetown. Last time we were in P-town was three years back, when we were dating and FREE. This time, with Nio, it was probably more difficult to enjoy ourselves than ever before. Both of us were constantly worried that the crowd, noise and weather would affect Nio and make him uncomfortable and cranky. We tried to make the best of the situation and decided to grab dinner quickly and head back. Nio nursed in the restaurant and had a taste of French fries, which he happily went to town on.

Nio devouring fries at a P-town restaurant

Day 4: Intention: Do nothing. Achieved: visit to the Cape Cod Brewery and to the local leather shop. Much more relaxed, we slept in, rested well and went to check out the local brewery place. The leather shop that we visited was really cool, it is owned by a Native American resident and she makes all the goods herself. The prices are also very reasonable. Madhu ended up getting few things and we got Nio a drum to encourage him to find a beat that he loves.

Day 5: Intention: start early and get home. Achieved: long ass drive which was 8 hours long and beating ourselves up for making the decision to drive back on a Sunday over a long weekend. Deep sigh, writing about this actually brings up a lot of anxiety. The only reason we did not decide to stop somewhere and get a hotel room was that Nio slept for three and a half hours. We somehow, just barely keeping our sanity, made it back home. Never do this, never leave the day before work week starts on a long weekend. The following week, all of us definitely felt the exhaustion of this trip and it was probably two weeks later we started talking about needing another vacation. Ah well! what's life without challenges - a super boring movie that no one wants to pay to watch. Until our next travel adventure with a BABY!!!

Montauk, NY

Month - May
Destination - Montauk, NY
Travel Mode - Road

Duration - 3 hrs

We have to say, we are getting better at this travel thing. Everything about it - packing, planning, pre planning, Nio is getting better too. This was going to be Nio's first beach sighting and experience and we were all very excited about that. It was going to be four days of amazing vacation. The best so far.

Beach day

It was Memorial Day weekend and we drove to Montauk on the Friday 24th May, and although we wanted to get on the road by 10:30 am, we were only able to leave by 11:45 am, which did put us right in the middle of traffic. Our travel time extended from 3 hours to 4 hours. Maybe more, we stopped counting because it was too painful. But when you're traveling the entire length of Long Island, some traffic is too be expected. Nio was holding up really well but of course the extension was testing his patience. The last hour was... incredibly trying.

When we finally reached the hotel, we just dropped everything and chilled out. We stayed at Breakers Montauk, the room was a really nice studio with decor that reminded us a lot that we were not surfers. That evening, we made our dinner in the room. Jes had made a run to the store to pick up some ingredients, which being in Montauk cost a fortune. We are still treasuring using that mayo and mustard.

Next day we were off to the beach, which was right across the street. A pointer: before our trip we got a beach tent from Amazon and it worked out really well. There was enough protection against the sun and wind and room for three of us to just hang out. So if you are considering something for your LO for the beach, you should check out a beach tent. We gathered our picnic - sunscreen, food, prosecco, more food and just hung out at the beach, it was just perfection. Nio played with the sand (and didn't try to eat it, amazingly). We went to the beach nice and early and were able to enjoy most of the day there with some time left later to chill and nap in the room.

Later that evening, we went to a seafood restaurant, Jes was craving Lobsters (a rare occasion) and guess what--we had lobsters. On our way to the restaurant, we also noticed few vendor tents and got curious about its whereabouts. We learnt later that it was an art market, which we decided we would check out the next day. After dinner, we went straight to the hotel and conked right out. Later that night, Nio woke us up at 1 am, maybe 2 am because of his teething pain. Poor guy :( We had to scramble to get his Tylenol and help him calm down. Nio was finally able to sleep late in the morning.

As always, though, Nio woke up the next morning with a smile as bright as the sun. We thought of a lot of ways to complicate our Sunday but then decided not to mess with perfection so we headed to the same beach as Saturday, pitched our shade tent and got to relaxing. Sunscreen, food, prosecco, more food. When we had more than two beach neighbors, Madhu joked that it was getting crowded. Next, we headed back to the room for a late afternoon nap. Like I said, perfection.

After a refreshing break inside we decided to check out the art show. Lots of beautiful pieces, some really odd pieces, most in a beach theme. We made an attempt at going to the brewery but it was beyond packed and we knew Nio would not approve so we headed to a nearby restaurant and drank beer there.

The next day we really took it easy and only went as far as the hotel pool for our water feature. Nio's first pool experience was a hit. Luckily they had a kiddie pool, which was nice and warm and Nio could stand in (with help, of course). He loved being in the water and very studiously watched all the older kids run around and splash in the big pool. We could tell he was taking a lot of mental notes.

Pool Day

Later we took a drive to Hampton Chutney, a local dosa place. The thing is, we'd been low carb for a while so a carby tube filled with carby potatoes was not what the doctor ordered. We also found out that this place, serving only Indian food, was founded and owned by two white people who had lived in India for some amount of time in their youth and decided that qualified them to make dosa for a living. When we got home and the carb dinner was not sitting well with Madhu, she yelled a lot of hysterical and highly accurate things about colonizers and cultural appropriation.

Our trip back was much more smoother than the trip in. Nio slept for most of the trip and we hit moderate traffic. This left us with time to reflect about our trip and life in general.

Showing Nio the ocean was incredibly special. Jes has always felt a strong connection to the water and has deeply happy memories of endless beach days with her family so sharing this with our son was momentous. Madhu just likes to lay around the beach the whole day so this was special for her too ;)

Onwards to our next adventure!!!

Rushland, PA

Month - April
Destination - Ross Mills Farms, Rushland, PA
Travel Mode - Road

Duration - 2 hr 40 mins

This trip would be a fun trip and centered around our favorite and only pet - Einstein. The farm came highly recommended and perhaps the only farm of it's kind on the east coast. We had rented their cottage for a night, along with spa and hoof trimming sessions for Einstein. Biggest to do was we had to figure out Einstein's transportation logistics, the last time we traveled with him in the car was when he was a foot long and weighed about half of what he does now. Typically he would sit in our lap but he's too big now (35 pounds localized to one or two hooves is like being stepped on by a woman in stilettos). We ordered a crate that we could fit in our trunk and decided this would be our best shot. We own a SUV but we had to scramble and scrape for space. Traveling with a baby and a pig calls for a U-Haul, lol. 

The morning of travel, we were able to lure Einstein into the crate with none other than peanut butter. After packing up the baby we were on the road by 10:30am, an hour later than we planned for but no complains, it's a lot of work. The drive was mostly smooth and at times a combination of Nio's screams and Einstein's grunts. A beautiful cacophony. We can't but have a good laugh about this life we chose to build. We love everything about it. Nio slept for his morning nap in the beginning portion of the drive but when he woke up we still had about an hour and a half left and he was getting fussy. Car rides are not his favorite so he had started to get fussy wanting to get out of his seat and look around. Jes then came up with this brilliant idea of distracting him by animatedly singing and stationary dancing to Michael Jackson’s greatest hits. It worked!

After reaching the farm, the first thing you realize and see is that there are pigs everywhere - behind enclosures, out in the open, inside the office area, outside the office area - just hanging. It is our private and public joke that we are the only people we know with a pig. We are probably the only people you know with a pet pig. So arriving to see so many pigs of different sizes, different temperaments, all living in harmony was really special and we felt at home right away. 

We dropped Einstein off for his bath and massage and we saw ourselves to the cabin. The cabin was at least 200 years old, very rustic and charming in its own way. The decor was PIG, it's a thing. See pictures below.

Pig on a Plate

That evening we had a nice cozy dinner (steaks - you are probably seeing a pattern by now) watching crouching tiger and hidden dragon which was one of the DVDs provided by our hosts because WiFi was not available "by design". Einstein by this time had explored the whole place and was just chilling with us. He was truly happy! To be honest, we were little bit concerned about how Einstein would behave, ie; peeing and pooping everywhere, and chewing everything. He did nothing of that sort. He stayed away from places we told him to and did his business where we asked him to and in general was much more calm than he used to be. We did have to get up in the middle of the night to resettle him once but overall he was just perfect and so was Nio, haha. 

The next morning we had an appointment for trimming Einstein's hoofs. We also realized that as smart as we were to pack dinner we didn't think about breakfast. So here we were getting hungrier by the minute, Jes considered eating Einstein's breakfast egg - the breastfeeding woman's hunger struggle is real. Anyway, we found door dash delivered to this remotest cottage so we ordered breakfast for four people, just enough for Jes' incredible hunger. Then the greatest treat, we walked Einstein on his leash for a bit around the farm, took pictures, and all the time Einstein was so well behaved - we were really proud. Of course, we couldn't walk much without someone cooing or telling us that he's a cutie, we get that for both Nio and Einstein. It's becoming a theme. So here we are ---

Full Family Portrait

Our drive home was about as eventful as the drive there, which is to say fairly smooth, given the nature of our passengers. This time on the ride back, the most bombastic Michael Jackson songs served as lullaby for Nio. They put him to and kept him asleep. All hail the King of Pop, you live forever!

Las Vegas, NV

Month - March
Destination - Las Vegas, NV
Travel Mode - Air

Duration - 5 hr 20 mins flight time+ 

You must be thinking, these guys are nuts to be flying to Vegas with a 4.5 month old. Quite right, but we'll let you in on a secret - we practice Nichiren Buddhism, which helps us realize that if one determines to do/change/overcome something, all the answers lie in your life. Trust your wisdom, courage and compassion. So here we were facing yet another work trip for Jes. With our learnings from the Atlanta trip, we knew what not to do and what possibly would be our low points, so in a way, this trip was smoother because we knew what to expect. Our flight this time was out of JFK, an hour plus drive. We chose to park at the terminal we were flying out of, which turned out to be a big advantage. Taking a step back, before this trip, Madhu was trying to put together an automatic feeding and watering system for Einstein so that we wouldn't have to enlist friends and family. This turned out to be quite challenging, we got very close to putting the thing together but the extreme cold and Einstein proofing the whole system was too much to accomplish in just 9 days and we had to abandon the whole project. We had to scurry to find people at the last moment to take care of Einstein. Big thanks to Jes' Mom, who saved us from a lot of anxiety and trouble. Also big thanks to our very kind neighbor and another dear friend who pitched in. That was probably the biggest stress lingering in our minds, besides the long flight, getting the flu, or having a terrible time at Vegas--you know, the usual. This time we had packed appropriately (smaller suitcases) and made sure our seats were not all the way back on the plane. We tried to upgrade our seats but because the flight was really full, we couldn't. On our way back, we were able to get preferred seating, which made a huge difference. Nio did very well for a 5.5 hrs flight, we have learned that he has more trouble with his ears when the flight is landing vs take off. 

Jes is kissing Nio's ears to help with the discomfort. 

It had been a long flight, so a combination of tiredness, hunger and discomfort led him to cry for the last 10-15 mins before arriving in Las Vegas. However, Madhu came up with some interesting distractions and was able to minimize his crying to a good degree. Our neighbor on the flight was not very friendly and we swear, at some point he was begrudging that he was next to a baby (speculation based on actual proof of eye rolls). Anyway, we had to go about our own business and make sure we were able to get out at the earliest. Once we were on the ground, Nio was ok and we went straight to the hotel and called it a night. It was 10:30pm Pacific time. This was the other thing we were wary about - the timezone shift and how that would affect Nio. It seemed like he had some jet lag (hellooo 5:30am wake up call) but his routine of 2 hrs between naps and 3 hrs between feeding continued irrespective. 

Next morning Jes had some time as her work would be starting around 2 PM, so we were able to hang out as a family and went to check out the Arts District in downtown Vegas. It was a really cool area, very different from the Strip and its boisterous energy. We saw some very cool antique shops, had some local beer - of course, by this time Nio had become quite popular in this area. 

Cool Graffiti - St Street

We had a wonderful time. We also did a drive by on Freemont street and saw the container park and the leaning Mantis, a quintessential landmark of Vegas which is not the first thing that comes to mind when it comes to this city. We went into Sunday feeling very positive and were looking forward to meeting Jes' cousin and Aunt who lives locally. It was a family reunion after more than 10 years. Jes had never met her cousin's husband and two daughters! It was a very special treat for Jes as Sia was a very close cousin growing up. She has many fond memories of Thanksgiving in Boston and being barely old enough to stay up late to play Dictionary and Pictionary with the adults and big kids. Reconnecting in person meant so much to Jes so we're so glad we got to do it, even if it was only for an hour.

Staying with Nio full time, Madhu has been really challenging her life state. This was the first time as a family we were in such a dynamic, uncertain, mentally and physically challenging situation. On top of this, Jes' breast milk supply was taking a hit because both of us caught a stomach bug. She had to pump more often, do power hours in the middle of the night and first thing in the morning to barely keep up with the number of feedings and amount. She started downing coconut water to hydrate and ate anything she could stomach to keep her calories up (mostly protein bars and muffins). We went through the small amount of back up supply we had and although he would only need 4 bottles through the day, she pumped at least 6 times to keep up with the demand. We were worried but it wouldn't be until the last day when we would fully panic and buy formula as back up, which would eventually fail as Nio would end up rejecting it. More in a bit.

Reflecting on being new parents - both of us are working mothers and each of us has had a different set of unique challenges when it comes to taking care of Nio full time. You almost always end up feeling that you are losing your self slowly and exist in a vacuum of time and space, yet this little human is the most precious and valuable life and you love them so much. It's a very complex web of feelings, which demands a lot of support, kindness and compassion from each other and our support system. It cannot be said enough that the most difficult thing/job in this whole world is raising a capable human being. With this realization and reflection, there are many social norms that need redefinition, unlearning and change - the role of women, both feminine and masculine leaning traits, gender biases, HR policies, basically rewiring what we think is important for our happiness. Matters of the heart are most important.

Next day, after Jes' work day, we were able to make a dash to the strip to see the Bellagio Fountains. This was Jes' and Nio's first time in Vegas and we didn't want to miss this one.

Madhu's world

Last full day was particularly challenging for us, Jes' breast milk supply had gone down to a point where we were just matching the amount Nio needed to feed. Between all this, we had also asked our good friend to babysit Nio that night, because a date night in Vegas just had to be done. We went to Waldorf Astoria, to Skybar. This is an amazing location - 23rd floor, the views of Vegas are stunning and beautiful. It was a perfect date night. We had long, deep conversations, gave each other our undivided attention (a rarity these days), and connected in the most meaningful ways. We were feeling very refreshed and in fact, on the way back, Jes pumped more than she had been all day.

Skybar and The Sinatra

Earlier in the day, we had ordered some formula and decided to give Nio some, this after a lot of internal debate, going back and forth because this was not our preferred choice but we couldn't let Nio go hungry. Later at night, we gave Nio a bottle of organic formula. He drank about a half an ounce and then just outrightly rejected the bottle and made a face which clearly said "this is yucky". Strangely, Madhu was so proud of this moment, and Jes felt extremely validated. Definitely a moment to reflect on in regards to our biases about formula. Biases aside, though, Jes is determined to make it longer than a year of exclusively breastfeeding Nio so changing that plan felt like defeat for a moment. When he rejected the formula both of us suddenly felt a new urge to up our faith that Jes will somehow start making more milk. She ate more, drank more water, pumped more and did more power hours that night, and we were able to produce enough milk. Next day, we were going home - the last stretch.

Our flight got delayed by an hour and a half but thankfully we were alerted before we left the hotel. The plane ride back was just the best one among all the flights we took with Nio. He slept most of the way and the rest of the time he was playful and kept himself and us entertained. When we got out, several fellow passengers complimented us saying that they didn't even realize there was a baby on the flight and he is the cutest baby - which we totally agree. He's obviously perfect. And we are not biased.

Victory Photo

The journey did not end there though. We had to get to the terminal at which we had parked and then make the hour plus drive back home. Nio slept and ate and then cried. He'd had it. When we got home though, his excitement to see a familiar place was palpable as well as our own. It took several hours to bring the excitement back down to a sleeping energy but we finally got there.

Jes' supply is still on the mend but we're almost back to where it needs to be for Nio's best health. We won't be getting on a flight again anytime soon but with this under our belts, we feel prepared for anything.

Atlanta, GA

Month - Feb
Destination - Atlanta, GA
Travel Mode - Air

Duration - 2 hr 19 mins flight time+ 

Bit of background, this trip was a work trip for Jes. She had just come out of her four month maternity leave and jumped into this training in Atlanta. Now we begin with exhibits A and B below which sums up our overall feelings about this trip.

Exhibit B - Exhausted but pulling through

Exhibit A - Self Explanatory

For the longest time, we had been strategizing, reading, researching the best way one can fly with an infant. However, as Madhu later expressed, that was not what took a toll on her, she got exhausted by all the anticipation of what could possibly go wrong.

Our flight to Atlanta was in the afternoon from our local airport in White Plains (which thankfully had direct flight options). We had bought this ginormous suitcase thinking we will combine stuff and thereby reduce the number of bags for more mobility. It was a good idea until we stuffed that case with everything in our life. At the checkin gate we were 8.5 pounds overweight and had to pay 125$ to check in 58.5 pounds. Misfire #1.

Nio was doing just wonderful all this time. Feeding every 3 hours, napping every 2 hours was working like a charm. He is such a curious, observant, and social baby. So giddy!! Lol. Next we flipped out the breast milk which we carefully packed in a cooler and Jes was all ready, declaring to TSA agents, this is BREAST MILK, offending some very hard working, definitely not ill-willed TSA employees while defending her right to take as much BREAST MILK as she needed for her baby. Thankfully Jes was ready to apologize for over-stepping and graciously went in for the pat-down (by a def gay lady TSA agent) when it turned out that they were discussing the fact that their machine couldn't test the milk in the bags we brought it in. Meanwhile, Nio had pooped his heart out and was evidently leaking. He was very calm just wallowing in his poop and occasionally giving us a smile, charming the pants off anyone who looked directly at him. We needed an exit strategy but our bags were still being scanned and Jes was being patted down so there was more waiting. Finally we rushed to the restroom, a kind lady let us go ahead of her, clearly she saw us hassled. We took almost 15 mins in the bathroom, this should give you an idea of how much poop was cleaned and changing was done. Important piece of information, Jes nearly missed dropping her phone in the toilet, instead it hit the hard, cold concrete of Westchester airport bathroom, cracking her screen. Misfire #2. After peeing (us) and pooping (Nio) we gathered ourselves and moved the party to the gate., We were feeling euphoric that this would be the first time we could pre board a plane without paying extra, all because we had an infant and needed extra time. Hell yeah, we needed extra time, space and all the comfort in the world.

Flight announcement - "PRE"....

Us - Hi! 

Our seats turned out, were not that great, though Madhu is certain the person at the checkin counter thought she really took care of us. She gave us the seats right at the back, being a smaller plane the inability to move seats back and the intensity of the sound we could hear was not the best. Nio was just fine throughout except for few times when he had his moments of uneasiness and discomfort and displayed his vocal abilities to the max. The flight was stuck at the tarmac for a while so that seemed like forever. After touchdown in Atlanta we headed to the car rental, got in and drove to the hotel. Hyatt Regency. When we got there, it was crazy busy and hard to get anyone's attention. Madhu's patience was thinning and we were both exhausted. At the checkin they told us we have a queen bed and we had especially called more than a week back and asked for king. Parking was full so they told us we have to park a block away then walk back 5 mins. After minutes of going back and forth and talking to everyone who couldn't help, we just decided to deal with it the next day. When we reached the room, we were shocked by the size of it. It was a wedge shaped matchbox with a bathroom that had no doors and a frosty window separating the bedroom from the bathroom. Madhu was so disappointed and upset at the same time. Nio had to be fed and there were a million other things we had to tackle. Also at night the AC vent would make a large clunking sound, which scared the shit out of us. Nio was unfettered by it but next morning, it scared the shit out of him. We tried to make the best of it that night but it definitely made our first night less enjoyable. Next day,  Madhu suggested that we speak with Jes' co-worker who arranged the hotel and have her upgrade us to silent HVAC system...and they did and along came a king size bed too! What a relief. Madhu is very picky about hotel rooms specially the amount of space there is in it. We were so glad there was room to move around and Jes didn't have to take a shower and do her makeup by the dim light of a piggy nightlight to avoid waking the household.

Next morning, Madhu had a social - she was meeting her high school friend who now lived in Atlanta and she hadn't seen her in years. Something worth mentioning, Madhu went to school in India but most of her high school friends are all over in North America, she has some high school friend in every city :) not to mention, two of them live in NY very close to us. Weird but interesting fact. Anyway, back to the trip - Madhu was feeling very anxious as she would be venturing out with Nio all on her own and that too in a foreign city. With some help from Jes, she was on her way to Krog Street Market and once she got there and saw her friend, she felt her nerves relaxing a bit. Of course, being home brewers, a stop at the local brewery/bar was not to be missed. As they say, kids need to start early!!

Hop City Tasting Room

Hanging out among beer products

On the tail end, we learned about a snow storm coming to New York that may interfere with our flight. NOO! We were not ready to be stranded in Atlanta for another day for many reasons, among them finding another person to feed Einstein more meals for however long it took to get home. No thank you. So we jumped at the opportunity for an 8am flight. We got up at 4:30am(!!) and left the hotel at about 5:45am. By the time we got to the gate it was 7:35am and they were about to start boarding. Literally made it just in time to grab some small amount of food from the nearby cafe and get on the flight. We were off. Nio was a serious charmer on this flight as well, greeting every person who passed us by with a huge grin. Excellent, we thought, be as cute as possible now so all of these people are more likely to forgive your dinosaur sound effects later. Our seats were somehow in the Comfort+ section (THANK GOODNESS) making this flight more comfortable by leaps and bounds. It was also less noisy, leaving us to wonder what was wrong with the engine on the first flight. (hmmm...) Nio slept for most of the flight, eating on either end of it. Could not have been more perfect. Jes was thoroughly engorged and leaking all over her shirt by the time we boarded so there was that, but luckily she remembered her haakaa hand pump and could let her breast leak into that under her shirt as the flight took off.

Traveling with a baby is no light affair. There is still a lot to perfect in the way of pumping timings and our own eating schedules (waiting on delivery while starving is not optimal) as well as day time entertainment for mother and son. The days were long for everyone and the nights felt especially short for Jes, who had to get up and be at work at varying way-too-early times. The trip was full of firsts. First flight for baby, Madhu's first time being with Nio alone for long stretches, Jes being away from Nio for long stretches, and Jes not only being back at work but really in the thick of it! Being that we came back with no missing parts (save Madhu's favorite hat) and no divorce papers being served, we think it was a resounding success!